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Feel the Awesome
An Interview with
Holy Fucking Crap
By Bob
Ignizio |
Sure, the full name of this band is Holy Fucking Crap aka Totally Fucking
Awesome. But don't think for a second these guys are a bunch of stuck
up egomaniacs. As the following interview should attest, they've got a
healthy sense of humor about themselves, and despite some members previous
involvement in the "almost made it" tech metal band Caligula, they're
strictly in it for the fun.
Utter Trash: Who's in Holy Fucking Crap and what do they
do in the band? Any sort of
interesting stories regarding how the band came together?
Joe: Holy Fucking Crap aka Totally Fucking Awesome
consists of Rye, Burrows, Jeff, and myself. The band basically formed by Rye
and I brainwashing Burrows and getting him to play drums for us instead of
beating the dead horse otherwise known as Caligula. That was part one of our
two part plan. The second part was to then slowly but surely coax Jeff away from
Damn Near Killed Him. Rye and I were just out to
steal members from other bands so that they'll break up sooner or later. It
only worked in one instance.
UT: You've got two former members of Caligula in the
band, including the vocalist/frontman, so obviously some people are going to
expect HFC to be in a similar vein to that band. What are the similarities,
if any, and what are the differences?
Rye: I don't think there are any similarities between
either band. Both bands are 2 different styles of music. With Caligula we
started off writing more metal songs and ended up being "tech metal" at the
end stages. With Holy Fucking Crap, I see it as straight forward thrashy
hardcore. The intentions of this band are also way different than anything
Caligula set out for. Unlike Caligula ever was, we just are here to have
fun. No goals. No Standards. No douchebaggery. The one thing I always hated
about Caligula was the fact that we didn't have fun. Our practices and shows
always had to be "perfect" It was something I never liked. I like being
goofy and having fun, and that’s what THT is all about. We don’t set goals.
We don't have any ambitions of "making" it big. As stated before, we just
wanna have fun making music and hanging out together. The band is more about
friendship more than anything, in my eyes.
UT: The full name of your band is Holy Fucking Crap aka
Totally Fucking Awesome. Just how totally fucking awesome are you?
Joe: this may be hard to explain, because I don't know
if all your readers are awesome. We’ve transcended to a whole new plane of
awesomeness. I think that we're so awesome that sometimes people who hear us
don't know what to do. Sometimes it causes the people who aren't awesome to
lose control of their bowels. I’d say making people crap their pants is
pretty fucking awesome.
Rye: I sweat awesome. That’s how awesome we are.....
Or that might be all the beer I drink.
Jeff: When I wake up with a ‘tent’, I let the ladies
play ring toss; that’s how awesome I am. You know how when you fart while
walking and you count how many steps it lasted? I’m a 40-step fart, that’s
how awesome I am.
UT: Right now you've got a few rehearsal tracks
available for download. Any plans to get into a studio in the near future
and do some more polished recordings?
Joe: Yeah, we're going at our leisure. The night we
did the rehearsal tracks was the first night we ever recorded ourselves. We
have our own recording studio that Chris handles and we practice in, so
whenever we feel like recording, we do. We’re going to try to have something
soon, though. That way we can sell it for an inflated price to support our
alcoholism.
Burrows: I listen to Spazz and Capitalist
Casualties. We could stick a microphone in Joe's asshole and it would sound
"polished" to me.
UT: What sort of approach are you taking with the
lyrics in the band?
Rye: I started off writing some silly songs about
buying beer at the Circle
K. I also had a song where I just counted numbers as fast as I could. But
something got to me about
that. As far as my lyrics go, I write what I know most about. If I come home
from a bad day at work and feel like writing a song about my bad day I will.
Or sour friendships, riding my bike, or even (yes it’s true) drinking beer.
And in fact there might be some songs about girls. But, for instance we have
a song now called "Burn This Bridge (Asshole)" I'm sure you probably can
figure out what this song is about. It's about the fact that the band I was
in and kicked out off, for something so petty and ridiculous. It's about
being in a band with 2 people who I couldn’t stand being in a room with, let
alone a van for a tour. I think you get the point.
UT: Anything else I should have asked about that I didn't you want to
comment on?
Burrows: Rampant alcoholism. Because I live in Ohio,
and it gives me something to do.
Joe: uh, nothing that I can really think of. Talk
about whatever the rest of the guys want to talk about, I guess. Oh, and
talk about the shows we’re playing in July. Yeah. I’d rather just go be with
my friends. So i’ll leave it at this: fuck work, fuck fakes, and fuck anyone
who disagrees.
Rye: sometimes the band locks me in a glass case of
emotion in our practice spot/studio. It gets really hot in there and really
starts to smell when the beer farts kick in.
Jeff: MERCH! Holy crap! If you don’t buy the merch,
then we can’t come to your town again to beat up those kids in girl jeans,
hot pink belts, and those cat-wrapped-on-your-head hairdos. Anyways, we’ve
got shirts, pins, patches, stickers, skateboards, oh my! We sell shirts
cheaper to girls though. Would you rather see a girl wearing your band’s
name, or some dude? The best was when we made those “Fucking is Posi!”
Shirts. Being positive is being awesome. Feel the awesome.
Visit Holy Fucking Crap
Myspace page.
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